Back to School

I was playing "Hang Man" with Grant. Because I am super-creative, I was having him guess the word CAT.
He got the C and A, but struggled getting the letter T. Since he was getting frustrated, I suggested he sound it out and then determine the last letter.
Well, he guessed "cap", "cab" and "can".
It was one of those moments that I questioned the IQ of my child. How could he NOT guess "cat"? Isn't that everyone's first guess?
Since then, I have changed my approach, I actually like that his first guess was not the typical "cat". This is because he does what a lot of homeschooler's do, think out of the box.

That's right, this is a homeschooling post, but homeschooling is such a big part of our lives, why shouldn't I post more about it? Also, with this being"Back to School" time, I felt it was only appropriate. I wanted to share a little bit about how we got into homeschooling and my thoughts on it, and even some drawbacks.
I would say that the Lord led me to homeschool. Homeschooling was not something I had planned on. I had always respected it, but never thought that I would do it. Honestly I didn't think I could do it for I am not "that" good of a mom.
The spring that Mikey was turning 5, I was having anxiety about what to do for his schooling. I had been doing Joy School (a co-op preschool that is done in the home) with some gals at church and I really enjoyed it. I found that the weeks I taught, I was more connective with my boys (Mikey and Roger both did it with the group). When I taught, we discussed what we learned and even emotionally I felt more connected with my boys, versus when someone else taught I felt that I would socialize with the other moms when I picked the boys up, but as far as connecting with my boys or even discussing what they had learned, I just asked how was school while in the car and that was it.
 Mikey was terribly shy and introverted, would not connect very easily with people, would not look at anyone in the eyes. With all of this, plus the fact that he had a later birthday in the school year, I was concerned that Mikey was not emotionally ready to start school. I had considered homeschool but Todd was very against it and not even willing to discuss it. Grant was about 9 months old and to be honest, I had my hands full and really did not push the issue.
I had a magazine that was a more "natural parenting' magazine. My mom had gotten me a subscription to it because of my choice to homebirth Grant. One day Todd approached me and told me that he was willing to talk about homeschooling. He had read an article about homeschooling in one of the magazines and really liked what it had to say. We discussed it and after much debate and prayer, we decided that we would do a trial year with homeschooling. We would do it for a year and if we liked it, we would continue with it, if not, we would have Mikey start Kindergarten the following year, allowing him to mature a little more and to be one of the older kids in class versus the younger.
We had decided to homeschool, but I was unsure of the "how". We went to a convention, which was really helpful, and I talked to some homeschooling parents that I had respected. Altogether, it just sort of evolved on it's own. I found that I do not like the "schooling at home" approach, which is pretty much that the child's learning looks and feels like it does at school, just at home. I do like the freedom and child-directed learning of "unschooling", but feel that it can be a little too lax without any structure. I do like the  "classical education", as far as learning from the classics, but find it can be too rigorous, and I like the Charolette Mason approach with doing a more structured morning with a more free afternoon. I sort of do an eclectic style and approach.

 I believe that a children learn very differently than just how the schools teach. Children learn a lot from free-time, from playing, from working. Kids, if there isn't an ever-present option of watching tv or playing video games, are usually quite productive and wanting to learn more about the world around them.

I do feel that kids do need structure, and we have our daily "schedule", which isn't too intense but gives the kids some order in their day. I know this sounds weird, give kids their freedom and give them structure, but I believe they need both (plus I feel there is danger in the extremes, it is moderation where perfection lies).

Free time involved these creations that they came up with

I ensure that the kids are learning the important and basic things: reading, writing, math, and then I give them more freedom of what they learn as far as everything else (like history, etc). I do think that reading (or being read to) is one of the best ways to learn. We can learn about history, science, reasoning skills, social skills, etc. by reading out of some good books and literature. So I try to read to them as much as possible, we always have a book we are reading, like we just finished The Lion, The Witch, and The Wardrobe. And of course we read the scriptures.

I also think that kids can learn a lot from doing work and chores. They learn to help and there can be a lot of good thinking that occurs while working. Also, I think learning how to function in a family is hugely beneficial. It helps to squelch the idea that they are all-important, and see that others are important as well.
The truth is children (and we) are always learning. For some reason the world thinks that at the magical age of 5, children are ready to start learning, yet they have progressed from a new born baby that did nothing but sleep, eat, and cry, into a kid that can run, jump, talk, and have ideas. And for the most part, the "teachers" were the parents - yes, learning can occur without having the most celebrated professionals. Learning doesn't always look like the learning that we picture going on in schools.

The boys' house made from recyclables

So we started homeschooling through, what I feel, the Lord's direction. Everyone that homeschools has a main purpose or reason that they homeschool. Some do it to protect their children (the more religious people- I agree that I like that I am able to protect my kids from the filth that they are exposed to at school, but I don't necessarily agree with this being a main motive for homeschooling for I do not feel that the schools systems are that corrupt and good Christians can still go though schooling and remain Christians), some do it because they disagree with the teaching style that schools have, some do it out of wanting to have their own schedule (which I will admit is wonderful), some do it because they want to be with their kids, etc. I agree with a lot of the "perks" that homeschooling allows that I just mentioned, but for us our motivating reason behind doing homeschooling is that our purpose is character development, focusing on our children to learn to become better people, to become more like Christ, plus I enjoy teaching them, I enjoy seeing their eyes light up when they figure something out.

There have been so many incredible benefits of homeschooling, and the more I have done it the more I have become more aware of them. The freedom that it allows my family is amazing, we are not subject to someone else's schedule or beliefs. The kids are more sheltered, sheltered from bad language, immoral behaviors, and even what's cool and not and that entire social hierarchy that is believed to be so important at the time. Some view the children being sheltered as a bad thing, but then we must realize that Christ's ministry didn't start until he was 30, so why do we think our children must begin it at age 5.

Art Museum

Disadvantages to homeschooling:
Well, one that a lot of other people see right away is there is no break for me as a mom. I agree. Sometimes it would be nice to have my kids go away for several hours, and I know a lot of moms cannot wait for school to start this time of year. But I have not known differently. When you have a baby, it's a lot of work and you feel overwhelmed, but with time and experience you get use to it, it becomes your normal. I have never had my kids go away from me consistently for several hours at a time to where I get use to the freedom and miss it when I don't have it. I also appreciate this for I do not have the "dreaded 3 o'clock hour" when chaos returns to your home (I just have it all the time:)
Another disadvantage that other people see about homeschooling is the "socialization". I will agree that homeschoolers are less aware of what is socially acceptable, but there are some socially acceptable behaviors I do not agree with and some not socially acceptable behaviors I do agree with. We try to teach our boys the socially acceptable behaviors and etiquette. I do believe that good manners helps everyone in every situation and good social skills can make a big difference in a person's life.  But if you are to tell me that putting a group of 20 7-year-olds with only one adult is what socialization is, I don't want it. My kids haven't learned that there's an age pecking order (that you are only equal to those in your grade, inferior to those above your grade and superior to those below your grade), and may they never.
 I feel that for the most part, kids pick up social skills from their parents. Experience and personalities do affect their social skills, but they learn a majority of how to be social from watching and experiencing life with their parents. Plus, if schools were the great equalizers of socialization, why are there so many weird kids in school?

Learning about canals and lock systems

One difficult thing with homeschooling is the fact that you are doing something different. Because of this, you can feel lonely at times. No one ever questions a person's decision to send their kids to school, but to decide to homeschool can bring out all sorts of critics.  You have to try to not care about what other people think for there are those that are very against it and are just waiting and wanting you to fail. There are also many that are supportive, and even those that are supportive but silent, but for some reason the objectors seem louder in your head. It can be hard and lonely to take that road, especially when you feel like you're the only one doing it. But it is becoming more and more popular to homeschool and there are a lot of opportunities to meet other homeschoolers.
For me, one of the hardest things and biggest disadvantage of homeschooling is the weight of it all is on me (at least that's how it feels). With the school system you have a good idea of the outcome. You know what to expect, and it's someone else's responsibility to make sure your kid learns. With homeschooling it's the opposite. I have never taught someone from beginning to end, I don't know if I'm doing enough or doing too much, and when it all comes down to it, I have no one to blame if the outcome is not what I wanted or expected. It is a lot of responsiblitity in that regards, no matter what type of teaching style is chosen. I have found that the only way to combat this is to rely on the Lord.
The flexible schedule with homeschooling is nice, but it can also be difficult. I hear a lot of moms at this time of year mentioning how eager they are to have the structue that school provides. It can be difficult to ensure enough structure in a homeschooling home, especially if you tend to be a type A personality that happens to be very easy-going. Then add in the fact that your husband has a very, very sporadic schedule, and no two weeks are alike, it can be very frustrating. But then again, because we homeschool the kids are able to see Todd a lot more than they otherwise would have been able. Todd works half of the weekends, but will usually have one day off each week, so that day becomes our family's "Saturday". 
One of the biggest drawbacks to homeschooling has got to be making lunch for everyone every day. I love to cook, but lunch is different. I will admit that I would be one of those moms that would be sending my kids with money to buy lunch at school. It's tough enough to come up with some variety for dinner each day, so lunch is out of the question. I do the same 3-4 things and add in left-overs when I can.
Truth is, homeschooling is just like sending your kid to school. There are good days, there are bad days. There are days you are amazed with your kids progression, there are days that you wonder if your kids will ever learn anything. There are days when I wonder how nice it would be to send my kids to the school that is down the block. There are days I long for some alone time or at least personal space. There are days I couldn't imagine anything better and I relish my kids sitting so close to me when I read to them. Just like sending your kids to school, in homeschooling there are pros and cons to whatever your choice. You're dealing with kids, so it's not always going to be easy.
I know that homeschooling was the road we were supposed to take. I know that for me, the Lord knows me well enough that He knew that it was something that fits me and my personality very well. I even dare say that He knew that it was the better choice for my children. There have been many instances where I have felt incredible gratitude for what homeschooling has allowed for my children. Homeschooling can be hard, it can be intimidating, but I have felt the Lord's hand in it. I have found that He has placed people in my life (and my children's lives) at a time that I or one my kids needed them. I have found inspirations come to me on what to teach or how to teach, inspirations that did not come from me. And I have always received an answer about homeschooling when I have asked the Lord, no matter how small or insignificant my question or concern.
Homeschooling is not perfect. It's not terribly difficult, but it's not always easy. But it has been such an incredible blessing in our life.