The convention was in Cincinnati, about a 5 hour drive for us. We left Thursday afternoon after Todd had gotten off of work. Since we would be stopping through Columbus, we planned on going to the temple on our way. When we were pulling off the exit for the temple, Todd and I realized that we had both forgotten our recommends. Thankfully we have some good leaders that can vouch for us.
While I was in the temple, Todd watched the boys on the attached grassy area - the temple is on the same property as a stake center. When I came out the boys were running around having a great time and Todd had a small bleeding hole on his forehead. He had gotten struck by a stick. Boys are wild.We got into Cincinnati late on Thursday, checked into our hotel and went to bed knowing that we wanted to be up early to get to the convention the next morning.
Grant did pretty good, especially since we just went from class to class. There were times he did get frustrated, not wanting to be there anymore, but having treats and an iPod did help him. The best was when he would be watching a Go, Go Diego on his iPod and he would yell out "Jump, Jump, Jump". Besides that, he kept pretty quiet during the classes.
Todd had a good time, and came back a lot more relaxed about our homeschooling. Sometimes he gets nervous about this different lifestyle that we have taken on. I know a lot of that is because it is very new to him and it can be intimidating, especially when you are so use to the school system mind set. It requires him to put a lot of trust in me, that I am teaching our kids sufficiently, and in the Lord, that the inspiration to do this was correct. Honestly, Todd does a wonderful job of being supportive of our lifestyle and I'm not sure if I had married anyone else if they would have been as supportive, but there are times he does get nervous or stressed out by the whole thing.
The convention helped Todd to see that everything is going to be okay. We saw thousands of other homeschooling families, and even though we are all different and our own "homeschooling ways" are as different as we are, we are all trying our best and most are succeeding. He went to a couple of classes given by a guy named Todd Wilson, who is a great speaker and a real, down to earth dad. He talked about being a father in one of the classes and about being a husband in another. He gave some great advice and encouragement that Todd really appreciated.
The convention really helped me, too. It rejuvenated me, it is nice to know that we're not the only ones doing this. Also, it made me feel peaceful and confident with how we are doing. Everyone homeschools differently, and even though I went to a couple of classes where the presenters were very intense with the schoolwork they gave their children, I gained a lot of insights from them, but still feel as though the way we are doing things is working very well for our family, and that our kids are doing great with their schooling and learning.
If I haven't written too much already, I am going to jot down some of the notes and insights I received from the presentation. If you're not interested, just skip now, I will not be offended...plus I will never know. This is just more for me to remember.
Susan Wise Baur (co-author of Well Trained Mind) Teaching Writing
1st grade- Copy sentences every day from good writing (do that with the boys copying scriptures)
2nd grade- Write single sentences from dictation - don't make them come up with their own sentences yet
Step by step instructions- keep it simple
-it's ridiculous to have your 3rd grader doing a big report.
Andrew Pudewa - The Four Deadly Errors of Teaching Writing
He had some great insights, and I thought that they could work in many different areas of teaching rather than just writing.
1- Over correcting
-give suggestions
-writing is more emotional, right or wrong is not really an option
-teach by example, they'll learn the "laws" or rules, but if you try teaching the "laws" or explaining everything to them, they won't learn the specifics
-have them read good writing
2- Withholding help
-independence in a skill is a result of the building of learning and experience
-kids will tell us when they don't need help "I'll do it myself!"
-when we withhold help, we think it will help them, but it doesn't
-treat it like teaching swimming - they have to prove their Independence before we let them on the swim team
-sometimes kids just need a model or example, if we withhold help we are leaving our kids more confused
-withholding help originated in the public education for it was a way to level the playing field for kids whose parents were/weren't involved
3- Unclear Assignments
-they need/want to know what is expected
-there are fewer unmet expectations because the expectations are put out in the front
4- Over Expectations
-some things/concepts just "click", can't be forced, have faith and don't get frustrated
-most of our over expectations comes from comparing our children to other children based on age - this is not fair, everyone learns and matures differently and in different areas
-compare them only to themselves - are they making progress
-if really frustrated, think about where they were a year ago
Amanda Bennett - Top 10 Tips for Successful Homeschooling
Keep perspective of WHY I am homeschooling and what success in homeschooling looks like
Reality in Early Years - not all sunny days, everyone has good and bad days
-Prepare for the Evening - develop a pattern of preparation of the evening and when dad comes home, have the house clean up, kids settled down, table set
-Make time for yourself- find something that recharges you - (running)
- Every Child is Different - Don't compare your children to each other or any other kid
Carol Burton - Help Struggling Reader Become a Great Reader
-Goal of reading is to make sense of words
-everything in front of the first vowel is the beginning sound/blend
-to know how to help struggling readers, we need to know what good readers do (their strategies)
Reading Strategies (What Good Readers do):
1- Always go left to right: through each word/across each line of print/page to page/ with letters
2- Match word for word (one to one), using finger and then eye
3- It always has to make sense
4- It always has to sound right
5- Stop at an error, and fix it (or at least try)
6- Re-read after a problem when needed, reread the sentence or phrase
7- If you know the word, say it right away
8- On unknown words, don't just stop. Always go left to right, start with first sound, then second sounds while trying to think what would make sense (an educated guess)
9- Go all the way through the word and match sounds to letters. Check yourself
10- Connect words into phrases, just like you talk
11- Read with expression
12- Read the punctuation correctly (.?!"")
13- Make some comments about the story...questions/predictions/observations/ connections to other books, self, world
-each time we read, praise for 3-4 strategies that they did well, then teach 1 that they did not do
-if having a struggling reader, get out 1st grade reading level material and hit the strategies really hard
Monica Irvine - The Etiquette Factory
-don't excuse your children from impolite behavior (like shyness) it will hinder them
-don't correct your child in front of others, it embarrasses them
-correct them in private, not even in front of siblings
Sincere Apologies:
1- Acknowledge that a wrong took place
-everyone needs to be accountable to what they did
2- Admit the wrong without excuses - doesn't matter what "Sally" did to them
3- Verbalize our apology
4- Commit to better behavior -"I'm sorry I yelled at you. I will try to not yell at you"
5- Keep your word
-sometimes a cool off period is needed before the apology takes place
-once forgiven, move on, don't rub in each other's faces
-when a person isolates their own behavior (not focus on the entire situation) it allows them to understand what they did wrong
Accepting the word "no" graciously
-we need to teach them how to respond appropriately
-when our kids keep on asking after receiving a "no", it's like them saying, "I don't respect your answer and I do not accept it"
Andrew Pudewa - Teaching Boys and Other Children Who would Rather Make Forts
-boys are very different from girls, biology even proves that
-you have to teach louder when teaching boys
-girls draw pictures of nouns (horses, dogs), boys draw pictures of verbs (explosions, racing) -nouns just look better, so no comparing them
-some boys think better (or handle stress better) while standing, don't force them to sit while learning
-Pain causes
-increase of blood to brain for boys (think more clearly, it's why they're the hunters)
-decrease of blood to brain for girls (thinking gets fuzzy, it's why we will continue having children, because women forget about the painful experience) - why you should never spank a girl
Relevancy - when something is applicable to you, it's a lot easier to learn
-4 forms of Relevancy
1-Intrinsic Relevancy - innate drawing to something, ex. boys and swords
-capitalize our kids learning on their intrinsic relevancy
--what they learn is not as important as HOW they learn, it helps their cognitive development
2-Inspired Relevancy - being inspired by someone else's love and enthusiasm of something
-teach things that you love, find someone (husband, friend, etc) to teach the things you don't love but that they do
3-Contrived Relevancy - things that are not interesting to you, but you have to learn it
4-Enforced Relevancy - get negative consequences if you don't learn or do things
-bulimic learning, purge and learn what you need for the test/course, take the test, throw up onto the paper what you know, and never learn/think about what you learned
-forced appearance of learning, but it's not really learning
3 Laws of Motivation
1-Children like to do what they think they can do
2- Children want to do what they think they can do
3- Children hate/refuse to do what they believe they cannot do
Budget their time so that 60-80% of the time, children are doing what they like (#1) to do and get better at it (math, science, reading, etc)
-20-40% of the time doing what they want (#2)
and very little time doing #3 - it creates very highly motivated learners and people
-make sure to have a full bank account with your kids, don't correct them more than you praise them
-when you praise your child, when you confirm your love for them, only then are they teachable
-be unconditionally loving, supportive, enthusiastic to your children - everyday
Dr. Susan Wise Baur - Homeschooling the REAL child
1-Diagnose the Problem
A) Is it Me
-do I have realistic expectations
-do I have a daily plan - kids like to know that the plan is
-have I forgotten that my child is a human being and not just a task
-ask "why am I so frustrated"
B) Look beyond the symptoms and understand the child
-what is the underlying disposition of the child and is that disposition being met
-if a child is fighting a curriculum or text, pitch it. it's not what they like or learn well from
2-Strategies
A)"Nibbled to Death by Ducks"
-don't do too much, for the learning will cease, instead have them "nibble" the information
-turn off your internal panic voice, your child will learn, it may be slower at the moment
B) System of Rewards
-learning is not the place to focus on your kids doing something that they don't want to do - "sometimes we just need to do hard things" - save that for housework or other aspects
C) Drop the difficulty level, increase the time
-helps them develop the skill that was learned with holes in it
D) Parent-Child Contract
-gives the self-motivated child more control of their life
- as long as they do their work, you agree not to hound them on it - for a little older child
E) Three Way Teaching - Hear, Feel, See
-reading is not the only way of learning, bring in the other senses
F) Set a timer
-none of us really understand how much time is passing at a given moment
-introduce a timer to help them understand how much time they spend
-kids have their own natural pace, timers will not increase their natural pace, but will cut down on bathroom breaks, looking out windows, etc.
-they have to be able to see the timer
-don't give punishments for not finishing before the timer goes off, instead give rewards, like extra free time
G) Block Scheduling - great for a single minded person
-allow them to do only one subject a day, they don't have to do switch and do every subject every day
H) The Written Checklist
-allows them to see what is expected of them
I) Let Them Choose their Own Curriculum
-older child - can give them parameters, but they will be more motivated if they choose their own curriculum
J) Step Out of Time
- not confined by the same schedule that public schools are, do what works for your child
K)Don't go Global - don't blow the problem out of perspective
Crystal Paine - I'd Throw in the Towel....If I Could Find a Clean One
15 Ways to go from an unhappy mom to a happy mom
1- Make your relationship with the Lord your #1 priority
-pray, read scriptures, everyday
2- Make your marriage your #2 priority
-flirt, do things (even if it means nothing) together
3- Get up before your children get up
-even 15 minutes can be an advantage
-get up behind them, you will be behind all day (go to bed by 10:30)
4-Set Goals
-live your life intentionally
-goals give us purpose and momentum
-make yearly, monthly, weekly goals
-1-2 goals a week
5- Develop a routine that works for you
-start with a morning routine
-keep it simple and flexible
6- Train kids to help with chores
-clearly communicate (and demonstrate) what is expected
-don't expect them to do it perfectly
-follow up
-praise 10x more than correct
--you are not managing an inconvenience, you are dealing with a human being
7- Implement an afternoon quiet time
8- Fill your mind with Good things
-read good books
-have book baskets for your kids to read while you read your own books, they will follow your example of loving books
9- Make your health a priority
-sleep, eat right, exercise
10- Make time for things I love
-make a list of things that I enjoy, that energize me
-include 2-3 things from my list every week
11- Focus on one habit at a time
-make a list of habits/areas I want to work on (me, homeschooling, character developments, etc)
-prioritize list
-pick one habit and work on for 3-6 weeks
12- Consider hiring help
-rather pay x amount of dollars to have someone clean your floors rather than x amount of dollars to have someone teach your kids while you clean your floors
13- Don't compare yourself to other people
-don't beat yourself up over what you can't do or aren't gifted at
14- Let go of perfectionism
-give myself grace
-take time to savor and enjoy life with the kids
-they won't remember their school lessons as much as they'll remember our time together
15- Choose gratitude
-contentment is a choice
1 comment:
I am so glad you shared your notes! It was so insightful. I plan on homeschooling Ryder when he is old enough, so one of these days I might need to pick your brain on the subject!
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